My grandpa & me. Long, long time ago… 公公&高中時期的我

那天,表妹毛毛在臉書上貼了這張相片,我吃了一驚。不,我還記得這張照片的時空背景。驚的是,下巴這麼尖,原來我也曾經瘦過呀!

為什麼那個時候老認為自己就是胖呢?我真的從來沒有過自信,即使知道內在才是決定真實美醜的關鍵。

When Cousin Mao posted this picture on my Facebook wall, I was startled. Not that I’ve forgotten about its existence. I was just shocked to realise that I was once so slim with quite a pointed chin.

So why was I so self-conscious then? Seriously, I’d never thought I was attractive due to my being so ‘big’ even though I knew that physical beauty was only skin-deep.

這些年來,我常常覺得自己像北極熊。很多人認為我是在自我貶抑,其實沒有,我的確身材看起來就是活脫脫的北極熊,也是真心喜歡北極熊,牠們是很迷人的動物啊。反正,都到了這個年紀,很多事情都能淡然處之了。調整運動和生活型態,也是因為我希望過得更健康,好好享受生命;如果身材有改進,那只是一個附加的收穫。

After having become a mother, I’ve always felt like a polar bear. A lot of people reckon that I’m simply too self-critical. But, I am not. I do look like one and I’m very fond of this fascinating creature. Truthfully, I wasn’t bothered that much by my physical imperfections. My senses are the starting point when it comes to taking care of my body.

終於,最近,又有了進一步的領悟。這幾天早上,作瑜珈的時候,看著自己的身體,突然覺得,其實。。。。。。還蠻可愛的嘛!雖然看起來就是很滋潤的肉肉模樣,連貓咪們都難以抗拒在這個肚皮上打盹兒的誘惑,但是,健康就好;而且,遺傳自家族的大骨架基因,還能瘦到那兒去呢?

這之後,一直都滿開心的。想想真的很虧欠自己的身體,這麼多年來,一直都對她不滿,嫌東嫌西,但是長成什麼樣,還不是我這個腦袋和嘴的責任嗎?

我親愛的身體呵,感恩!!

Lately, I’ve just had a beautiful epiphany.

These past few days, during my morning yoga session, looking down at my body, I suddenly thought to myself, ‘You’re actually quite cute… though obviously looks like a bean bag. But at least, even the cats approved of its divine quality by always napping on it. What’s more, you’re healthy and that’s the most important.’ Seriously, how small can you get if the ‘polar bear’ gene runs in your family?

It’s a happy epiphany. I really owe this to my body. All these years, I’d been picking on it, but it’d never occurred to me that whatever way it turns out it’s always my sole responsibility.

Thank you ever so much, My Dearest Body! !